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So today marks the last day of 2014. Today is a very memorable day with many memories!! The start of the year was so fucked up but yet I pulled it through. But life have been better ever since the 23 July 2014. This is when I met someone special! Every since than I have been smiling everyday and making more friends! My friendship with my best friend became stronger and I learnt that only true friends stay by my side through thick and thin! I can never lose my best friend because she is my everything. We've been best friend since the start of this year and its gonna be our second year of friendship tomorrow! SO EXCITED!

Here are some photos with many memories! ENJOY! ^^

basically these are the most important people to me and I can never lose them. I never regretted knowing any of them and my life have been better ever since I knew them! I can never forget how I met each and everyone of them! it's too memorable! love spending time with them when I'm free. Anyway~

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVE! ^^

Toilet adventure

Yesterday was the day i met my best friend at bedok mall and it was a study date. After study date we went to the toilet and had our first adventure there. 

TOILET ADVENTURE 

She's the best of the best friend i could ever find. Even though she has bad temper as stuff but i still love her. She's been there for me when I'm upset. Comforted me and heart to heart talk to each other. Really appreciate everything that she have done. 

We've been friend since kindergarden and became best friend 3 years ago when i first entered secondary school! Didnt expect that she would be my classmate again! Is this fate? 

She's beautiful, caring and she's very spendrift😂! We've both been through a lot and changed a lot. No one could understand me as well as she could, whenever I'm quiet she knows what I'm thinking without saying a word. She'll find ways to cheer me up by treating me food and making me laugh. I never had a wonderful friendship. I do treasure this friendship a lot and never wanted to end it. Although i show her attitude most of the time she dont mint instead she came to talk to me and settle the problem, 

This was 3 years ago when we first entered our secondary school life! HAHAHAHAHA! I hope our friendship will last and never want to lose her ;). 

//6 June 2014//

A few days ago was my sort of 'brother' birthday! We have known each other for about 4 years. I known him since i was like primary 6. Heres me without makeup. He have seen me with and without makeup before and surprisingly he didn't judge me and accept me for who i am although i have alot of pimples on my face.

A lot of people say he looks like my boyfriend, we look like real siblings bla bla bla. Yes we dated before when i was primary 6 and he was my first love. Though we didn't last for very long because at that point of time my parents dissaproved us. We went through alot and our friendship was really complicated. 

On 6 june we celebrated his bdae and later at night i went to his friend chalet whose birthday was also on 6 june. SHE WAS SO PRETTY!!!!!! I was really shock! So heres a few selfie. Though we didnt take picture on your birthday at least we had some selfies that we took! 

Actually earlier on that day we had cold war LOLLLLL. Cause of some misunderstanding but later at night we were fine. HAHAHHAHAAH FUNNY SHIT.

Oh its just an eye-candy

Yoyo so its been some time since i blogged and my life hVe been brightening up each day because i've moved on and let go of what doesn't belong to me. I can't bare to see my blog just die out like this. I tried to talk to him but didnt expect him to reply me in a way thag gave me a false hope. At that point of time i knew something wasn't right and everything went wrong. At least now it doesn't bother me that much. Never thought that i would blog today even though im sick. 

Since my mother didn't allow me to hang out today with my friend as im sick i decided to take some selfies Hahah

Ignore my measy bed. Im not OCD that is why HAHAH

Anyway ive been having breakout lately so yeah that is why my nose has a red spot hahahahah 

Anyway im not a type of girl that would move on easily it did took some time but whats the point of carrying on having a crush on someone when they don't even know how you feel. I bet his life is much more better i can't hold on anymore. I tried telling myself to let go many times but it didnt seem to work until i found someone better. He may not be the best but hes been there for me when i have problems. 

I have been treating him as a brother until a few weeks ago he treated me quite well and i started to fell for him little by little? Never thought that through my crush i would have known him than become a brother and than become someone special to me i guess? 

Doesn't mean that i like someone else means that i'm a slut or whore neither a player. That shows that i can move on fast enough. There was a point of time where we sat somewhere at night and told each of us our past and funny stories  didn't know we would be that close now. 

Didn't regret knowing him though he never made me angry. He made me laugh and smile try to cheer me up by telling me funny stuff. 

Even though we never took a photo tgt judt hope he wouldnt mind because he doesnt like taking pictures hahahah ill force him the next time i meet him ;> EVIL ME HAHAHAHAHAH 

What's gone is gone

This is the first time i have ever regretted not cherishing someone i love and it really hurts to see them leave just like that. I know i may not be a good enough for you but to me your good enough. This is the 3rd time i have ever love someone for so long. I have my reasons for all that i have done but i think is useless now. Whatever i do or say means nothing to you. I want to know how you have been, but looks like you have found your source of happiness. 

Happiness Never Last

I may not know what you are doing now and then but just wanna let you know that i really care about you even though you are avoiding or what? Whenever i talk to you i will be on cloud 9 and my heart pounded so fast. After regretting not cherishing you. My life have been so miserable. 

- No motivation to study

- Dont have good appetite

- Mood ruin

- Thinking about you

- Not concentrating in class

I really dont care how you look and your family background. The most important thing is i like you for who you are. Stalking you have been a daily routine and looks like you are doing fine with her.

I really hope time could rewind to the time when we were texting so much and emoji's. For no reason you started to cold reply me which i have no idea why and u stopped replying me. I was upset and kept hoping you would reply but you chose not to reply. What can i do? I can't force people to reply me if they don't wanna talk to me. Crying to sleep every night thinking about you doesn't help with you starting a chat or talk to me. Yes, i may show attitude sometimes and you should know why. I admit i am jealous when you kept talking to my enemy. Since you know i dont like it why arent u doing smth about it. Cant you just stop talking to her. Sigh i really dk whats your mind going thru. I give up

Though the second time you asked me for stead on the 14 april which is the black valentine. I wanted to accept but at that time something happn and i don't want people to think that i am a player. Hope i could get ever you and move on :)

 

I'm sorry for making you upset and false hope. I really regret and i think you have a new crush now? Congrats and hope you will last long with her :) 

Happiness

A world filled with happiness all that i need.

I don't need people to destroy my life or make it worst/

Try me

I won't be easily defeated.

I will stand strong.

I don't want to be the weak me anymore,

It's time for a change .

Let's not live in the past and move on.

Leave the past and explore the future.

Let's say goodbye to our past memories and say hello to the new world

New world, new life, new beginning.

No point staying in the past filled with emotional feelings.

It will only make our lives more miserable.

When someone hurts you,

cry a river,

build a bridge and get over it.

Why not start a new life and start a new?

I know some of us are unable to forget the past., It's mostly caused by the memories we had with our loved ones.

Have you ever felt cheated before?

Yes i have.

The feeling was worse than i thought.

I got cheated once.

I have learnt my mistake by not trusting people so easily and not falling into their trap.

All they are hunting from us are our virginity.

Beware of such monsters.

You might never know what could their next plan be.

 I have moved on and fortunately i have found my happiness.

It all happen end of January in 2014.

He came into my life and made me smile each day.

Making my life brighter each day and cheering me up when i am down.

He never gives up on what he wants.

Maybe it was lucky to know him.

Without him i wonder what my life would be right now.

Maybe i will still be living in the past and crying to sleep everyday.

It's been so long since i felt so much care from someone; friend

He could make me forget about my past and live my life.

Life must move on ;D

Never ever back out, stand strong and fight for your rights; happiness.

Blessing

Should i say i was blessed to have him?

Maybe it is

Maybe it not

But i chose to have him.

Wonder how he looks like? 

He looks like a qt i swear HHEWH <3 

He looks better real life though especially when he smiles. HE LOOK FREAKING CUTE 😍

Isnt he such a qt? Sorry but my face cant maintain so i decided to put catwang hahahah!

This was the photo of us on the first day we met. It was on the saturday and we agreed to have a study date. My first

Impression of him is so damn cute and handsome. We had out study date and later on we went to watch ' The Lion Men'! The movie was freaking AWESOME! It was funny and entertaining ! After the movies we went to walk around and decided to sit at the open air at bugis+ 

We chatted and camwhore HAHAH

Can't get my eyes of his face. 

On the friday i went yishun to fetch him from school and have our dinner. Sat somewhere at the playground and chatted. Well ofc we camwhore HEHEHE

Isnt he a qt? But his hair is shorter cause of school HAHAHAHAHAH😂😂.

Many things happened on that day. I am so lazy to write it out but i really had a great day with him. How wish i could meet him everyday and see he qt face of his ;> 

His really a blessing from god. How wish i could have known him earlier so i wouldn't have to go through so much pain and hurt in the past. Although he may not be very handsome but as long a he treats me well is good enough ;3 

That day was really a memorable day for me ;> 

Valentines

A few days ago it was valentines day and it was quite upsetting as someone special can't seem to celebrate valentines with me. In the end i went out with Junhong ;>. Taking the iniciative to pick me up from school and he gave me a huge tou stitch 

Isn't it so kawaii?!?! *.*

We spent the day watching movie, the movie was so lame i swear HAHAHAHA. 

After the movie he sent me home and worse thing is he doesn't even have a ezlink card which means i made him oay much more. I felt so guilty he even treat me to the movie.

This is a photo of him lying on my legs cause hes tired LOLLLL. So i decided to play with his hair and tie his hair HAHAHAHA WHAT A GIRLY FRIEND I HAVE. 

When he sent me home he lepak downstairs my house and went i reached home, my sister asked my family to play mahjong and im gonna be alone so i decided to ask my mum if he could come up my house and accompany me to chat while they were playing mahjong. Surprisingly my parents allowed and he ate dinner with my family hahahahaha. He look so shy and awkward. Funny shitz. 😂😂😂😂. 

He was setting up the mahjong table for my sister and i took some snapshots of him HEH HEH HEH 

I actually forgotten to take photos with him before he left but it was a really great day spent with him. Although we talk to through whatsapp is different from the way we talk real life he is actually fun to hang out with. When he smile hes eyes is actually very small and cute HAHAHAAH. So qt him. Wonder why no girls would want him. Hes so cute and adorablez. Which ever girl date him is really a bless from god. HAHAHAHAHHA wat the hell am i saying.

Ill write till here then. BYEEEE *waves*

 

Decision

I really have no idea what's on my mind right now. I feel lost, unwanted. I really don't want to let go of him. Why is my life like this?at this state?

Maybe i'm just being paranoid.

It was really happy meeting you, hanging out with you having those laughter. Seeing you smile make me smile too.

Had so much memories that i can't forget. I know these days we hardly met because of our time schedule. It really doesn't match.It crashes. I really want to see you so badly even right now even if we are in an awkward situation right now i just wanna see you. I really miss your face and your smile.

No one can heal the scare in my heart. It was really upsetting these days. Kept tearing at night, over-thinking.

When i say i wanna move on i really can't. Now and that you have asked me to forget and give up, i really feel like breaking down. My heart broke into million pieces, it can't be fix back even with the stickiest glue in the world. I really need someone's shoulders to lean on, talk to. On the outside i may be fine, but deep inside it feels really really bad. You know i really can't give up on you that easily right for the past 1 year and so. 

^

This totally shows how we are behaving for the past few weeks. We can't be together because of some reasons. Even if we are together we don't even have the time to meet.

How can i be happy without him?

Anyway this is a song that makes me reflect, made our memories came back

I really wan to lay on bed the whole day and die down there right now. I'm not being attention seeking. I feel really bad right no. It seems like i would have to cry to sleep tonight again. After receiving his message, tears started to drop.

                                    

Hurt by Christina Aguilera

The voice within by Christina Aguilera

To Be Honest, I really miss him alot